Wednesday, August 22, 2007

I'd Like to Announce My Retirement


That's right folks, Simply Suds is hanging up his spikes from The Win Column. I woke up this morning with absolutely no ambition to blog....in fact, I woke up this morning and really didn't look forward to anything besides the girl that isn't even hot, but somehow manages to give me a little chubby in the morning when I make that miserable mile and a half drive to Dunkin' Donuts to get my iced coffee. Suds has hit rock bottom. He has a lot of soul searching to do over the next few weeks to try and dig himself out of the shallow grave that the month of July left him in. Two catastrophic injuries, a loss in the softball playoffs after making a Kirk Gibson like recovery from a mangled hand, and now getting canned from a painting job that a bunch of junkies and people that belong behind bars somehow manage to hold on to.....was just the final straw. Hopefully, I will someday return with stories of pissing some helpless girl's bed, or staying up until the sun rises getting weird in somebody else's hot tub....but until that time....I bid you all farewell.

To my fellow Win Column teammates....keep fightin' the good fight. Tell tales of naked chicks, hot chicks, smut, boobs, a$$es, and everything else the perverts that read this site thirst for. I want Red Sox fans to $hit on Yankees fans, and vice versa. I want stories about how Randy Moss and the Big Ticket have rejuvenated the city's thirst for the greatest sport on earth, and a sport that I could care less about.

It's been real and it's been fun. See you all in hell.

17 comments:

Ridin' Dirty said...

Cut the $hit! You don't have to go into seclusion. Just blog when you have something. Your blogs keep all of us going and you are just going to throw that away because you hit a speed bump in life? Come on! File your reinstatement papers with The Win Column! "Say it ain't so Sidsy"

XOXO

Ridin' Dirty said...

Sudsy* sorry for mistake!

Love you!

Chieftain said...

He'll be back -- time heals all.

Anonymous said...

what a pussy. grow a pair and deal with it. get your ass back on the computer and blog you homo

Anonymous said...

good riddance

Anonymous said...

My prediction is that this site tanks without Suds. Chieftain does the sports analysis, and Suds gives us the humor for the site. Take it from someone that runs a successful site, Suds could write for a lot more popular sites than this one. I haven't read funnier blogs in a long time.

Anonymous said...

ummmmmm The Win Column is the best blog in Beantown and its just a matter of time before its the most popular

Ridin' Dirty said...

Anonymous from 2:00pm: GROW UP and why don't you share with us who you are? Whats your site?

Chieftain said...

Trust me, I don't even need to reach out to Suds to hear him out. I know he'll be back. I give it until Tuesday before he's back and better than ever.

Right now, he's just stirring up new ideas and new one-liners. No question about it.

Get well, Suds.

Nightmare said...

Ok. So are little Sudsy is down in the dumps. We've all been there at one point or another, but I think this time we pull it together for a buddy.

Please contribute to the - Upscale hooker for Suds Fund.

Details on were to contribute will be posted soon.

Also if any ladies out there are looking for some fun, make your way down to the Beautiful Plymouth, MA beaches and ask for Simply Suds. He is well known and should not be hard to find.

Gallup Poll said...

Who's a worse speller: Steina or Nightmare?

My God, fellas.

Mr. Macido said...

Seriously, whats up with you losers using "are" instead of "our?". Even kids that flunk out of school trying to get their GED can use those pronouns correctly.

Butchie said...

What did I raise a little pussy? Get back to blogging and make me proud.

Jamie V said...

I always knew that Orlando was lazy and didn't like to give it to me on a regular basis, but you were a stud in high school. Don't leave us now.

Norman P. Orlando said...

Huh?

sticky wicket said...

This will last about as long as Roger Clemens' "retirement".

Grow up said...

After I thought about this whole retirement blog I came to the realization that who gives a f^cks! Sudsy..go cry me a river. wwwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I'm not blogging anymore. GROW UP! Become a MAN!