Thursday, September 20, 2007

Swedish Women Fight for Right To Bare Breasts

I love Swedish women. I absolutely LOVE them. Tall, blonde, gorgeous... I might even go as far as to say that if I could only hook up with one nationality for the rest of my life, I'd exclusively hook up with Swedish chicks.

That's why this news piece caught my eye. And by caught my eye, I mean gave me an embarrassing semi at work. The details of this story are too good to be true! Kristen Karlsson and Ragnhild Karlsson, who are 21 and 22 respectively (and oddly NOT related) are college students in Sweden. Recently they were banned from bathing topless at their local pool. THIS IS A TRAVESTY!!!!

...sorry, I get worked up about human rights issues.

Continuing: these two Swedish hotties are now petitioning for their right to show their beautiful Scandinavian ta-tas, stating that it imposing on their rights as women to bar them from going topless.

You can't fight this kind of logic:

"On Wednesday, the two women sent a letter to the Equal Opportunities Ombudsman explaining that they saw no reason for men an women to be treated differently. If anything, a bikini top could be accused of drawing unnecessary attention to a woman's breasts."

Have you ever oogled a pair of bikini-clad boobies, sir? I rest my case.

Clearly this is a movement we can all get involved in, and I think that TheWinColumn can solidly put its full support behind these two young, verile, and undoubtedly hot pioneers of the Swedish feminist movement.

To recap, hot twenty year-old Swedish coeds try to go topless and are thwarted by an authoritarian lifeguarding regime. You can't make up sh*t this good!

For the full story, go here:

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Donovan McNabb Is A Whiny B*tch

Boo friggin hoo Donovan. So you’re latest rant is that you stink this year because there is too much pressure on you (and other black QBs) because no one wants you there and you have to try harder to impress. Waaaaaaaah! Give me a friggin break. That excuse is so weak I want to smack you but my hand is too small to give your fat face an adequate jolt. I’m so sick of people playing the race card in sports, and in particular football. You play in a league that is DOMINATED by African-Americans. The majority of the league is black for christ’s sake. But no, you have to come out and say Carson Palmer and Peyton Manning don’t have it nearly has hard as you do. Maybe that’s because they’re way better and you stink this year. Is that at all possible Donovan?

What about Eli Manning, Joey “ I just wanna be a back-up” Harrington or even Chad Pennington. Those poor bastards get killed by their fan bases and the national media. Chad Pennington got cheered at home (at home!) when he got hurt for crying out loud! Do you think he has it tough because he’s a pickle? Joey Harrington doesn’t know what the hell to do. He’s been trying like hell to be a back-up QB anywhere and everywhere he goes he falls ass backwards into the starting job and stinks worse than curdled milk.

Donovan, don’t get me wrong. I like you as a person, I think you’re a great QB and an above average leader of a team (although that performance in the waning seconds of the super bowl, arguably the most defining moments of your career, was about as gross as a wet fart after chili). I’m sure if the Eagles let you go (which I don’t think they will) the majority of NFL teams would kill to get you. Do you think maybe, just maybe its not that you’re black, its that you play in Philly which has the WORST fan base in the history of professional sports? So don’t use the race card dude, you’re better than that. Its too easy to throw down the race card when you stink to take the attention off of your abysmal play. And if the last thing you’re thinking about as you try to thread the needle to Brian Westbrook is that you need to hit this pass because black QBs need to try harder to gain respect, then maybe you need to re-prioritize your concentration?
P.S. On a complete sidenote can we PLEASE have weight limits for flight attendants I'm so f*cking sick of having their fatness rub up against me when the woddle up and down the aisle

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Happy Birthday Keeley Hazell!

No lie the first line of Keeley's wikipedia site reads " a British Page 3 girl and glamour model noted for her large yet non-augmented breasts. " Yet another reason why the British are completely cleaning our clock when it comes to hot chicks. Also, upon further review of what exactly a page 3 girl is, it turns out there is a newspaper in the U.K. called The Sun that every week will publish a straight up butt-naked photo of an absolute smoke show. Bingo! Sign me up for that paper. Too bad this country is a bit to sexually repressed to trust the general public with that.

Anyways Keeley happy birthday! I hope the asshole that gets to see you in your birthday suit chokes on his tea and crumpets.


Cornstarr's Arrival at TheWinColumn

Seriously, this is how I got here. Ever since I first tried the Inflatable Body-Pod Suit (which retails on the internet for a mere $107.14) it has become my preferred mode of transportation whenever possible. Not to mention the fact that when you're 8 beers deep, it's just about the most fun thing you've ever done in the water with your suit on. Or off. Depending on who you are and how you roll.

I look forward to building on the wicked sweet foundation the previous writers from TheWinColumn have built, and solemnly pledge to bring you the best in sports, music, hot chicks, beer, violence, and things that make you say, "what the f*ck was that all about?" People are going to sh*t all over me, and I'll sh*t all over them, then we'll go out and kill Bud Lights (to bury the hatchet) until we get in a fist fight when they find out I f*cked their sister last month and now she's late. It's gonna be awesome.

Monday, September 17, 2007

Boston Turns 377 Today And Adriana Sklenarikova Is Friggin Gorgeous

What a great day. Coming off a weekend that saw the Patriots absolutely destroy the Chargers and prove once again that LT is a whiny bitch and Philip Rivers probably didn't even make his Pop Warner team. I was so friggin pumped by that win that I almost forgot the Yanks took two out of three against the Sox this weekend. But it doesn't matter because we're still up. But on this great day as most of us are enjoying the quintessential turning of the seasons in New England, we should take time out of your day give props to Beantown. Yes, yes ladies and gentlemen today is Beantown's birthday and I bet most of you didn't even know it. On this day back in 1630 the Puritans founded the Massachusetts Bay Colony. Those brave lads laid the foundation for the city that you and I rountinely stagger through every weekend. They are directly responsible for creating those shady alleys that provide ample darkness for us to exploit our vices if we see fit. So tonight, in case you needed another reason to go out drinking other than MNF, have one on Beantown....its been so good to you through the years.

Which brings me to my next point: Adriana Sklenarikova. She has nothing to do with Boston, has never been here, and probably couldn't even say the word if you asked her to. But guess what?? Her birthday is today AND she's ridiculously hot and I'd lick her armpits. Apparently she's credited with making the wonderbra popular in Europe and her cans were pasted all over the place back in the day.


Sunday, September 16, 2007

This chick makes my palms sweat!!

Rocio Guirao Diaz, best thing since spell check