Thursday, September 13, 2007

Professional Athlete's Wives Suck At Life





I'm not really sure what to make of this one, but part of me thinks that this must be a joke. Recently an avid reader of the The Win Column (I know I couldn't believe we still have those either) pointed a website out to me that is completely dedicated to catering to athlete's wives and I've been baffled by it ever since.


I always thought that professional athletes wives had basically won a lottery of sorts. They were essentially plucked out of relative nothingness, and not only brought into the national spotlight, but ever since the day they said "I do" the 'working world' as you and I know it ceased to exist for them. They get put up in million dollar homes, get pimp cars, have people wait on them hand and foot and never......EVER....have to worry about working another day in their life. If their husband is a super star, and they aren't completely heinous (i.e. Kurt Warner's wife) they might end up on national TV or some sh*t. Right?


Well apparently life for professional athelete's wives isn't all chocolate chip cookies and gum drops because they have a website (http://www.prosportswives.com/) that is designed to give " self-help, motivational articles, approved announcements from the leagues and management, and informative news from government agencies such as the Federal Bureau of Investigation, the United States Secret Service, and other league security officials, to inform members on scams and schemes created by individuals who prey upon and steal from athletes and other famous, wealthy people."


"Motivational articles". What in christ's name do they need movitational articles for? Randomly being dropped into the lap of luxery isn't motivating enough you whiney sluts?. The website goes on to say:


"Have you ever noticed how a wife has a knack of turning a house into a home? Or can take an empty refrigerator of leftovers and turn it into a full meal? And, what about that special kiss, or those comforting words that can infuse invisible strength and empower our loved ones to go out and tackle any situation and kill Goliath!"


I'm going to go out on a limb and say that most athletes wives aren't struggling to cook dinner every night. Their personal chefs are, but not them. And I'm not sure maxing out your husband's credit cards is 'turning a house into a home'. But hey, thats just me.


So next time you're done paying the monthly bills and check the bottom line in the bank account and you're less then enthused. Just imagine how tough it could be to be married to a millionaire.
*Thanks to Staci for the heads up
Orlando

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

Norman...great article. Leave this blog and start your own!

Anonymous said...

Norman...great article. Leave this blog and start your own!

Chieftain said...

FYI: I looooove the Rams (-3) and the Bears (-11.5) this upcoming weekend.

Take notice, as I GUARANTEE a 65% winning track record. I know, I'm incredible.


Season Record To-date: 2-0

Anonymous said...

Good call chief

Anonymous said...

i like the rams big too. have to agree with chieftain there. that was my pick of the week also. the bears line is up to 13 now across the board pretty much too. tough pick but id take the bears. im going to stay away from that one though, even though i dont think the chiefs will score more than 10 points. what are you thoughts on the pats covering 4?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous from Plymouth should quit his job and just bet for a living.

Anonymous said...

haaaaaaaaaaaa. im thinking about it. and by the way. here is the pick of the day sunday: tease cincy down to a point against the low life browns and tease the pats to plus 2 against san diego. no brainer. if you dont trust the pats, give st louis 3 points at home. either way, cincy is going to rock the browns so open up a tease with them and find another team you like and move the line 6 points. like taking candy from a baby.

Anonymous said...

Not to flip scripts cause I'm all about letting it ride......but how the F---K does Greg Oden need season ending surgery less than 3 months after being drafted? Good thing the Celts didn't get that bro or I'd be contacting Clayton Bigsby.

Chieftain said...

Personally, I'm staying far away from the Pats-Chargers game. Could I envision the Pats winning by 2 TD's? Sure. But at the same token, I could see the Chargers winning out-right. Let's face it, they're two of the three best teams in the NFL right (I actually think they are the two best teams)...anything could happen, esp. considering it's only the second game of the season. Too much motivation (on both ends), too many distractions (on both ends), too many unknown variables for my liking this week.

I also considered the Bengals (-7). On paper, it seems like a no-brainer. But, I never bet on road teams at the start of the season -- I like to see how they react on the road. Vegas is begging people to bet on Cincy in this game, knowing fair well that Cleveland is a very hostile environment. Again, could Cincy destroy Cleveland? Absolutely, and it's probably the more likely scenario...but I won't be the one reaping the benefits and/or losing my shirt over this game. As noted earlier by Anonymous by Plymouth, this is a type of game in which you tease (and I'm one that is normally opposed to teasing NFL games)...

Anonymous said...

Hi! Good idea, but will this really work?