Friday, October 12, 2007

Term of the Week



Wafflestomping


The Brits out-swear us, out-slang us, and just plain out-filthy us on a consistent basis when it comes to language. They have words that are so disgusting we don't even know what they mean. For example, if someone called your sister a slapper, slag, or said they'd pull her, you'd know you were being insulted, you just wouldn't know how.

This must end.

In an effort do expand the breadth, depth, and luridness of the American-English lexicon, I am offering up the term of the week. Call it a f*cking education.

Each term of the week will be pushing the boundaries of decency, expanding your mind (or more likely, the gutter in which it will exist), and basically give you new sh*t to throw at your friends over a beer or six.

With this in mind, I begin with Wafflestomping:

Wafflestomping has 2 meanings. The first, and more widely used, means beating the ever living piss out of somebody to the point where the tracks of your boot are left all over their face, leaving a waffle pattern.

The second, and more hilarious usage, comes from stupid hippies who want to conserve water... or perhaps from ultimate utilitarians, depending on your perspective. In order to save time and to avoid the awful hassle of using a proper toilet, they will take a dump while in the shower, and then stomp it down the drain with their foot. Needless to say, you don't want to be housemates with these folks.

...and the next time you're getting busy, and you're sucking on some hottie's toes, remember this post. Then pray you don't catch hepatitis.

1 comment:

smarmy brit said...

A reet cliver clogs an al!!